Introduction: I didn’t want to write this blog

11 Feb

See, I’ve done the feminist blogging this before. Been there, done that, bought the incredibly disturbing t-shirt. (Or made. Whatever.) Ultimately I got burned out on blogging, converted the blog to a reference site, and hung up my blogging hat. I’ve been enjoying these last few months of not blogging, too. So what changed my mind? What made me hop back on the blogging bicycle? (Yes I’m mixing my metaphors. Shut up.)

Well, as the name of the blog might imply, I got pregnant. I’m a first time mom, so this is a pretty new experience for me. But as soon as I started telling people, I couldn’t help but feel weird about some of the things that started happening. My feminism senses were tingling again and I started getting the itch to write about it. Maybe online in some kind of irregularly published format… Like… a blog…

But no! That way lay madness! So I repressed the urge. I wasn’t going to blog about feminism again. I wasn’t! …obviously that didn’t last. So what happened? Well, two things.

1) Last week I finally announced to all my friends that I was pregnant at a large party. A male friend congratulated me, then observed that I’d now get to deal with people judging me about every decision I make through the rest of my pregnancy and beyond.

And it was true! So true! Within about twenty minutes of telling my co-workers (previous to the party), one of them scolded me quite harshly when I confessed that I’m not sure I want to be pregnant again after this pregnancy, since it’s been a rough first trimester. “DON’T YOU DARE,” she told me, and then proceeded to lecture me about how awful it is to be an only child. Even at the party, people made comments casually assuming what decisions I would be making regarding the baby like “but you’ll be breast-feeding by then” or “you’ll still be home with the baby at that point”.

What is it about being pregnant that strips away your autonomy to make decisions about your baby’s future? Seriously, people. I almost wanted to start a blog right there and then so I could write about how messed up that is. (Though let’s be clear. I know that my friends were very well-intentioned and didn’t intend any offense.)

2) Reflecting on some of this stuff, I posted on facebook that I was thinking about starting a blog and oh god someone talk me out of it nooooowwww. The response I got was… well… not exactly what I was looking for:

…and on in that vein. So here I am, giving in to the inevitable. To the male friend who made the incredibly accurate observation at the party (you know who you are) and to the friends who didn’t talk me out of this: this is all your fault.

So what can I expect?

For those of you coming from Go Make Me A Sandwich, I’m going to moderate comments extremely heavily. This is a much more personal blog about a personal experience that happens to be written from a feminist perspective. My tolerance for trolling, or even snark, will be very low. Also, don’t expect huge, well-researched posts. For the most part you’ll get feminist rambling with a side of sarcasm. My intention is absolutely not to make this yet another ‘oh god pregnancy is hard whinypants’ blog. The internet has enough of those, thanks.

I’m not sure how often I’ll post, but I imagine I have more to say on the subject that I think I do. (That’s how it happened last time.) I also may or may not continue the blog after the baby is born. We’ll see. I’m pretty much playing this by ear.

Wundergeek out. (For now)