Fifteen Weeks: On pregnancy as the root cause of everything

2 Mar

One of the stereotypes I’m getting tired of is the pregnant woman as a weepy ball of hysterical, emotional hormones, because that just hasn’t been my experience. And, you know, I get it. Pregnant women have crazy amounts of hormones that do wacky and unpredictable things, and some women do get more emotional as a result. But it’s a little tiring having to be wary of people assuming that when I get emotional that I’m just hopped up on pregnant lady hormones. I’m an emotional person, people. I get easily worked up about stuff. It’s not hormones, it’s just garden variety “I’m messed up about stuff”.

Case in point.

When we finally started telling people about the pregnancy, we told pretty much everyone we knew over the span of one or two days, including my co-workers. So I told my co-workers and had the “I’m pregnant” conversation for the umpteenth time and everything seemed fine… Until later that morning when I heard something on the radio that reminded me of my father. And all of a sudden it hit me all over again that I couldn’t tell my father I was pregnant and I just started crying. So of course that was right when one of my co-workers walked by my desk.

She wanted to make sure I was okay, so I told her what was going on and she nodded sagely and said something to the effect of “hormones”. And I nodded and went along with it, even while I was saying to myself – no. It’s been less than a year since I lost my father, who I was close to. This isn’t pregnant lady crazy. This is just me missing my father. Arg.

I know that it will only get worse once I start actually showing. Right now my current clothes are still pretty much hiding the pregnancy because in the past when I’ve carried extra weight it all goes straight to my stomach, so I tend to go for shirts that emphasize the boob and de-emphasize the stomach. But I’m already getting a preview, thanks to my tae kwon do classes, where it’s starting to have real impacts on my limitations.

The most obvious of these is having to swear off participation in any sparring or other drills that involve contact. There are others, though, mostly centering around the fact that I don’t bend quite as well as I used to. (Considering that I’m always admonishing students in the weekly class I teach not to be lazy during the warmups, it’s something they pay attention to.) And, being teenagers, they’ve taken to ascribing everything I do to my pregnancy. No I did not forget which hand you do that block with because I’m pregnant. I’m slightly dyslexic and get mixed up sometimes. No, I am not picking on you by making you do drills you don’t like because I’m pregnant. It’s because you’re whiny teenagers and I’ll admit to taking perverse satisfaction in making you do drills you don’t like that will improve your technique. It’s schadenfreude, not pregnancy.

…and so on.

At least for now I can “get revenge” by making my students work harder. Would that I could do that with everyone who will accuse me of pregnant lady crazy in the near future.


3 Responses to “Fifteen Weeks: On pregnancy as the root cause of everything”

  1. Diana March 3, 2012 at 4:54 pm #

    Very good point. It did annoy me a little when I would mess something up and people would automatically assume it was pregnancy-brain-related. Every time I ate a pickle (which I always liked, and the frequency of my pickle-eating did not change one way or another while pregnant), Stephen would joke about it. Although it can make a handy excuse sometimes. Don’t want to clean out the cat litter? Sorry, pregnant. 🙂

    • wundergeek March 4, 2012 at 5:46 pm #

      Not having to change the cat litter is pretty nice, I will admit, since that used to be my chore.

  2. Beast of the Sea March 4, 2012 at 5:58 am #

    My sympathies. I’ve noticed that people will pull this ANY TIME anyone is assumed to be temporarily-or-not neurodivergent for any reason. At least you managed to figure out a way to take advantage of it… 😛

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